Managers don’t need perfect answers. They need the confidence to listen 

By Joseph Conway, psychotherapist and workplace mental health trainer, Vita Health Group 

It’s true that the conversations we avoid are usually the ones we need to have the most. And that’s no different in the workplace. 

Conversations around stress, burnout, performance, conflict, and mental health are no longer occasional. Instead they’re becoming part of the everyday fabric of working life. Both internal pressures, such as demanding workloads, redundancies and tight budgets, and external pressures, like the constant background noise of global volatility, economic instability and health concerns, are leaving many employees feeling stretched and overwhelmed. 

And when people are under pressure, those pressures tend to show up at work. Recent data brings this into sharp focus. According to Gallup’s State of the Workplace 2026 report, 46% of UK employees said they had experienced stress “a lot” of the previous day. In fact, UK workers are more stressed now than at any point since Gallup began surveying for stress in 2010. 

The confidence gap very few are talking about 

There’s no denying that organisations are making real progress on mental health. For managers – who are on the frontline of employee wellbeing – awareness is growing, the language is feeling more familiar and most are now equipped with key information (policies, signposting, escalation processes). 

But something important is still missing. From my experience working as a therapist and delivering training to managers, I find the biggest challenge at managerial level not to be awareness, but confidence. 

Mental health can feel like a minefield, and managers often tell me they’re worried about saying the wrong thing. There’s a real sense that they’re walking on eggshells, afraid that one misstep could make things worse. So instead of leaning in, they hold back. 

They change the subject, rush conversations, or default to problem-solving. Managers are the squeezed middle, often under huge pressure themselves, and for many the natural instinct is to try to fix the issue quickly and move things on. 

This is completely understandable. There’s often an unspoken expectation that they should have all the answers, hold everything for everyone, and keep things moving forward. 

But when it comes to employee mental health, it’s rarely something that can be resolved neatly in one conversation, and it certainly doesn’t follow a script. What it does require is something much simpler, and for many, much harder: the ability to listen. 

Where do conversations go wrong? 

When conversations about wellbeing or performance fall off track, it’s often because the employee hasn’t felt heard. We know that if someone feels interrupted, judged, or dismissed, even subtly, they tend to shut down. Important details get left unsaid, issues remain unresolved, and trust between employee and manager begins to erode. 

That’s why strong listening skills can transform the quality of workplace relationships. Listening well helps people feel genuinely seen and valued, and that really is the crux of it. 

In high-pressure situations, the skill of active and deliberate listening can de-escalate tension and create space for honesty. The good news is that it’s a skill every manager can learn. 

Six ways to listen more effectively when it matters most 

Managers do not need to become therapists to have better conversations at work. That is not the expectation. But they do need to be intentional about how they show up in difficult situations. 

Here are six practical ways to strengthen listening skills in tough moments: 

1. Be present, genuinely present: It sounds obvious, but it’s often overlooked. Good eye contact, putting distractions away, and giving someone your full attention sends a powerful signal that what they’re saying really matters. In virtual settings, this might mean closing other tabs or silencing notifications. 

2. Pay attention beyond words: Communication isn’t just verbal. Tone, posture, and facial expressions often tell you more than the words themselves. Notice hesitations, discomfort, or changes in energy. It’s equally important to be aware of your own body language. A slight lean forward or a nod can show engagement without interrupting. 

3. Ask open questions, not leading ones: Questions like “Can you tell me more about that?” or “How did that feel for you?” invite people to share their real thoughts, rather than steering them toward a particular answer. This also shows curiosity and interest rather than judgement. 

4. Reflect back what you’ve heard: Summarising what the individual has said, for example, “It sounds like you’ve been feeling overwhelmed with the workload and unsure where to start” helps ensure you’ve understood correctly. More importantly, it shows the other person that they’ve been heard. 

5. Resist the urge to fix: When a team member shares a problem, the instinct is to solve it. But often, what people need first is to be listened to. Advice has its place for sure, but timing matters here. Jump in too quickly and you risk shutting the conversation down. 

6. Get comfortable with silence: Silence can feel awkward, especially in emotionally charged conversations, but it’s often where the most important thoughts surface. Giving someone space, without rushing to fill it, can make all the difference to someone who’s struggling to voice how they’re feeling. 

Rethinking what ‘good’ looks like 

If there’s one thing I emphasise in every training session, it’s this: you don’t need to have the perfect response. 

Managers are not there to diagnose, and they are not there to fix everything. At its core, these conversations are about compassion and being a decent human being to another human being. 

Usually, what employees remember isn’t whether their manager said exactly the right thing. It’s how they were made to feel in the moment. Did they feel rushed, judged, dismissed, or did they feel heard, understood, and not alone? 

And with that, we need to rethink what ‘good’ looks like in these conversations. It’s not about having all the answers or resolving everything in one sitting. That’s not how mental health works. 

But managers do need to create a space where someone feels safe enough to speak honestly. For organisations, that shouldn’t be treated as a soft skill. It’s a foundation for effective conversations and, in today’s workplace, one of the most important capabilities a manager can develop. 

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this opinion piece are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of The Well Crowd. This content is for information and discussion purposes only and should not be taken as medical, health, or professional advice.